Do you wanna hear it?  Do you need me to scream it?  Okay, here goes: IT'S WEDNESDAY - HUMPDAY!  Why so quiet you ask?  Well, Stacy is out of town and it being HumpDay and all...well...er....come on!  Fill in the blanks!  I HAVE NEEDS!  It's sooooo very sad.  But, when my body can't be used like playground at the public park, I resort to desperate measures - I USE MY MIND!

Okay, it's true that when history records the great minds of our generation, like Dr. Phil, Larry the Cable Guy and Jessica Simpson, I probably won't make the list.  But I have plenty of good thoughts too.  For instance, I started today on the sofa sleeper in our trailer popping bubble wrap to the Lynard Skynard tune of "Sweet Home Alabama!"  I got pretty good but ran outta wrap after a couple of hours, so I pulled out the X-Ray glasses I got through the mail from the back of one of my Wonder Woman comic books. (In case you're wondering, they're way too powerful 'cause you can see bone through flesh, but not flesh through mini-skirts & halter tops - they're useless at the mall).

Anyway, next up, I tied a piece of bread to my fishing pole and went squirrel fishing in back of our trailer.  I caught a few, but none big enough to barbecue for dinner on the Weber Kettle.  Finally, I found an old toaster and taped it in the on position with a strawberry Pop-Tart in it.  After about five minutes or so, VOILA, Pop-Tart Blowtorch!  The flames shot outta the top at least 9 inches (which is a measurement I throw around bars allot!).  Folks, I never tire of getting used for my God-like body, but just like the Scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz, "...if I only had a brain..."

      
I got pretty good popping in time with Lynard Skynard!     They see right to the bone - too powerful - can't see skin!
  
      
Squirrel Fishing - I caught a few, but too small to eat!            Pop-Tart Blowtorch! - Don't try this at home - OK, try it!