NOTHING SAYS "I LOVE YOU" LIKE APPLIANCES AND POWER TOOLS!
KISS - KISS, SMOOCH - SMOOCH! Yep, it's Thursday (Friday Eve), but more importantly for the Hallmark Greeting Card Company, it's VALENTINE'S DAY! The single biggest sale day of the year for 4" x 6" folded pieces of construction paper covered in glitter and slurpy sayings. Also, it's the single biggest day for future diabetics to start down that sugary path with expensive chocolates from Russell Stover, or a Whitman Sampler - talk about high priced confections!
Folks, don't think for one minute that just because we live in trailer park (modular home!) and are two-strike felons that we don't have romantic feelings too! Why some of the most romantic times Kevin ever had was when he was in Central Lock-up on that bogus Mann Act charge. And Stacy still stares off into space when she thinks about all those nights in the back of that VW bus with her junior high English teacher (oh yeah, and her gym coach!). That's why mere cards and candies don't adequately express the love we feel for each other.
APPLIANCES & POWER TOOLS - Now that's true LOVE! What good is mushy card when you can have a new vacuum cleaner (with a HEPA-III air filter!)? Talk about the gift that sucks, but just keeps on giving. And what about a new steam iron with "auto-temp " so Stacy can't melt Kevin's polyester leisure suits anymore? WHOA! And let's talk about a new (from a yard sale, but new to us) circular saw and a 60 piece tap & die set (SAE and Metric!). Listen, this is what love is all about! And speaking of love, we're headed out on the town tonight and if we're lucky we'll find some that doesn't cost us a trip to the free clinic like last time...
Now Stacy won't melt Kevin's leisure suits anymore! Nothing says "LOVE" like a circular saw!
SAE and METRIC! Now Kevin can go "both ways!" Talk about a gift that sucks! - in a good way!
Folks, don't think for one minute that just because we live in trailer park (modular home!) and are two-strike felons that we don't have romantic feelings too! Why some of the most romantic times Kevin ever had was when he was in Central Lock-up on that bogus Mann Act charge. And Stacy still stares off into space when she thinks about all those nights in the back of that VW bus with her junior high English teacher (oh yeah, and her gym coach!). That's why mere cards and candies don't adequately express the love we feel for each other.
APPLIANCES & POWER TOOLS - Now that's true LOVE! What good is mushy card when you can have a new vacuum cleaner (with a HEPA-III air filter!)? Talk about the gift that sucks, but just keeps on giving. And what about a new steam iron with "auto-temp " so Stacy can't melt Kevin's polyester leisure suits anymore? WHOA! And let's talk about a new (from a yard sale, but new to us) circular saw and a 60 piece tap & die set (SAE and Metric!). Listen, this is what love is all about! And speaking of love, we're headed out on the town tonight and if we're lucky we'll find some that doesn't cost us a trip to the free clinic like last time...
Now Stacy won't melt Kevin's leisure suits anymore! Nothing says "LOVE" like a circular saw!
SAE and METRIC! Now Kevin can go "both ways!" Talk about a gift that sucks! - in a good way!
Yup, things have not changed a bit at your residence. Same two kooks just another day. Kev,you would not believe all the snow we have here - about 3 feet deep,and it is exactly 0 degrees out right now! Last Saturday nite it was -35 below zero with the wind chill. We are going to be moving to Palm Springs sooner than you think and getting jobs at Taco Bell. Somewhere real warm because we can't take this misery much longer - only maybe another 12 years or so if we are still alive. Anway, we've got to go now and you know what that means, we cannot help but love you two.
guy and cary.
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I know times are tight right now so that must be the reason why you guys gave each other gifts that you use around the house, like a saw or vacuum cleaner. You guys are such Nerds!
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