FEVER, RASH, HEADACHE - "DON'T WORRY, THEY'RE JUST THE USUAL SIDE EFFECTS!"
THURSDAY - FRIDAY EVE! The weekend is finally here! Okay, many of you may have to go to work tomorrow, but we know that nobody really works hard on Fridays. Everybody just shows up, goes through the motions and talks about what they are planning for Saturday and Sunday. Before we got fired the last time we used to do that too, so we know what happens on Fridays at work. You can't fool us!
Anyway, this is DAY TWO of our inoculation/immunization/drug odyssey. In preparation for the Riding4Beer World Tour (starting June 10th and sponsored by Coor's Light) we had to get all sorts of nasty injections and take all sorts of ugly pills yesterday to protect us from every disease except syphilis and gonnorea (DAMN!). So here's the deal, NEVER believe any doctor that tells you the inoculation side effects may be mild fever, rash or headache! MILD FEVER AND HEADACHE OUR ASS! We're laying here on the sofa-sleeper sweating like Mississippi whores in the summertime and our heads feel like the day after that time we drank a whole keg of beer by ourselves.
The good news is that now we won't get Typhoid Fever, or Hepatitis, or Malaria, or Diphtheria, or Tetanus, or Yellow Fever, or Encephalitis - BUT WE CAN STILL CATCH THE COMMON F'ing COLD! So how does that work? (rhetorical question - no need to respond, remember?). They can give you some pills and some shots in the arm or butt and you're safe from all these terrible things, but if someone sneezes in your direction on the bus you can still get the flu! It's modern medicine folks and our HMO paid for it, so we consider ourselves lucky. Speaking of lucky, we've never caught anything from a public toilet seat yet either, but we're willing to learn...
Why isn't this battery powered like the one Stacy has at home? Cheap clinic - they don't even have K-Y!
LIVE typhoid vaccine - You gotta be kidding! Oh, they have a toll free number - that's nice!
Anyway, this is DAY TWO of our inoculation/immunization/drug odyssey. In preparation for the Riding4Beer World Tour (starting June 10th and sponsored by Coor's Light) we had to get all sorts of nasty injections and take all sorts of ugly pills yesterday to protect us from every disease except syphilis and gonnorea (DAMN!). So here's the deal, NEVER believe any doctor that tells you the inoculation side effects may be mild fever, rash or headache! MILD FEVER AND HEADACHE OUR ASS! We're laying here on the sofa-sleeper sweating like Mississippi whores in the summertime and our heads feel like the day after that time we drank a whole keg of beer by ourselves.
The good news is that now we won't get Typhoid Fever, or Hepatitis, or Malaria, or Diphtheria, or Tetanus, or Yellow Fever, or Encephalitis - BUT WE CAN STILL CATCH THE COMMON F'ing COLD! So how does that work? (rhetorical question - no need to respond, remember?). They can give you some pills and some shots in the arm or butt and you're safe from all these terrible things, but if someone sneezes in your direction on the bus you can still get the flu! It's modern medicine folks and our HMO paid for it, so we consider ourselves lucky. Speaking of lucky, we've never caught anything from a public toilet seat yet either, but we're willing to learn...
Why isn't this battery powered like the one Stacy has at home? Cheap clinic - they don't even have K-Y!
LIVE typhoid vaccine - You gotta be kidding! Oh, they have a toll free number - that's nice!
You folks are a whole bunch of silly bastards, and your nutty too! We cannot believe you're allowed to roam the bars at night. You're filled with Coors light, you get like a couple of zombies in heat. Your beginning to frighten us! Really, we wished we were there to help you both through this drinking problem. We could help you drink those 30 packs of Coors light, but remember, we cannot help but love you two.
guy and cary.
Reply to this