IN PALM SPRINGS WE DON'T PLAY GOOSE GOOSE DUCK - WE PLAY GUESS THE MAGNITUDE!
WEDNESDAY! It's not just HumpDay anymore! It's MAJOR HUMPDAY! There was a time when a person could lay around on the sofa-sleeper pretty much all day on Wednesday and other than bill collectors and process servers nothing would bother you. Not anymore. Cal-Tech scientists (where really smart people go to college because they're too ugly to have sex) tell us that the San Andreas Fault (which runs literally right under Palm Springs) is gonna be moving allot these days because it's time for the "Big One."
Okay, we know that we live in "earthquake-land" here in Southern California (SOCAL, BABY!), but this is getting ridiculous. It seems like we're laying under the kitchen table more than we're laying on the sofa-sleeper (we are, but not always because of earthquakes!). Folks, we always thought that "stop, drop and roll" was a dance you did when you were too drunk to "go, stand and walk!" We hope that when either Obama-Rama or Candy McCain rigs enough votes to get elected president that they do something about these God damned earthquakes.
Every day we're losing money because our Franklin Mint collector plates ("...some have historically appreciated in value" - Parade Magazine, 2008) keep falling off the shelf and breaking when they hit the trailer floor. And seriously, we don't know how many times we've had to re-hang our velvet paintings of Elvis because the nails keep pulling out of the wall. This whole earthquake thing has dramatically increased our beer drinking because of the stress - so if we become alcoholics, it's not our FAULT!...
TWO PHOTOS TODAY AND A VIDEO! THAT'S RIGHT FOLKS - MOVING PICTURES!
Caltech earthquake map - No sex, but GREAT science! Time to repave our trailer park - damn earthquakes!
VIDEO - JUST CLICK ON THE ARROW AND HOLD ON!
Okay, we know that we live in "earthquake-land" here in Southern California (SOCAL, BABY!), but this is getting ridiculous. It seems like we're laying under the kitchen table more than we're laying on the sofa-sleeper (we are, but not always because of earthquakes!). Folks, we always thought that "stop, drop and roll" was a dance you did when you were too drunk to "go, stand and walk!" We hope that when either Obama-Rama or Candy McCain rigs enough votes to get elected president that they do something about these God damned earthquakes.
Every day we're losing money because our Franklin Mint collector plates ("...some have historically appreciated in value" - Parade Magazine, 2008) keep falling off the shelf and breaking when they hit the trailer floor. And seriously, we don't know how many times we've had to re-hang our velvet paintings of Elvis because the nails keep pulling out of the wall. This whole earthquake thing has dramatically increased our beer drinking because of the stress - so if we become alcoholics, it's not our FAULT!...
TWO PHOTOS TODAY AND A VIDEO! THAT'S RIGHT FOLKS - MOVING PICTURES!
Caltech earthquake map - No sex, but GREAT science! Time to repave our trailer park - damn earthquakes!
VIDEO - JUST CLICK ON THE ARROW AND HOLD ON!
Quick-Call FEMA and get some government money to cover your losses! We can't have Kevin running around without beer! (Actually we can't have Kevin running around period!) Get governor Arnold to declare your trailer park a disaster area (wait it already is) to open the way for low interest (sub-prime) loans to help you back on your feet again. Remember free money is only a disaster away!
Keep smiling and have fun!
Wendy and Ron
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Kevin, a little warning, don't sleep to close to the crack (in the window), you may catch a cold. Still missing you guys, hope to see you soon, that is if you haven't fallen through the cracks.
Ramon & Gloria
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You two loonies never cease to amaze and entertain us! WE hope that never changes!!!! Now get a job Soooo we can drink more, ""Long Islands Baby""!!!!
Just sayin'...
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You silly bastards are back at it again as usual only worse this time! You're both sick and very disturbed individuals. You both are suffering a severe mental illness - you two are in need of bed rest! Have Deshaundra give you a medication that will help you. You are both in our thoughts and prayers, and remember, we cannot help but love you both. Have a speedy recovery.
guy and cary.
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