YOU'RE PROBABLY TRAILER TRASH IF YOUR FAMILY REUNION IS HELD AT A REST STOP!
Can you say THURSDAY? SURE YA CAN! It's Friday Eve and there's sooooooo much to tell. It's a good news/bad news deal so sit down and read (without moving your lips!). Okay, bad news first - The owner of our trailer park is raising the f'ing space rent! Something about "maximizing his internal rate of return on invested capital to achieve the appropriate risk/reward ratio." Yeah, well we got your internal rate of return right here, a__hole!
Now don't take this out on Lowell. He's just the trailer park manager not the owner. Well, he used to be the owner but lost the park because of those damn asset seizure laws that come into play when you're charged with "possession with intent to distribute." The funny thing is, none of the stuff was his. He was just storing it for Sinteeka's half brother while he did his time in county lockup on that bogus morals charge. Anyway, the place was auctioned off and some "investor" from Canada and his Vegas showgirl wife bought the place. Now, after only six months, he's raising the rent - damn capitalist!
Soooooo, on to the good news - ROAD TRIP! Oh yeah, baby! We're hittin' the road tomorrow and driving up to NorCal. We figure that as long as we stop every 100 miles or so and add a quart of oil our '86 Taurus should make it to Sacramento. Okay, get this - FAMILY REUNION! That's right, it's the first time in years that we've all been out of jail at the same time so why not get together, swap some lies, remember stuff that never happened and talk crap about former husbands and wives. Oh yeah, and drink beer and barbecue. Especially drink beer....
We hope they increase our Section 8 vouchers! Our trailer park's new owner and his showgirl wife - Capitalists!
The rent increase caught everyone by surprise! The Pabst keg runing dry also created shock & awe!
Now don't take this out on Lowell. He's just the trailer park manager not the owner. Well, he used to be the owner but lost the park because of those damn asset seizure laws that come into play when you're charged with "possession with intent to distribute." The funny thing is, none of the stuff was his. He was just storing it for Sinteeka's half brother while he did his time in county lockup on that bogus morals charge. Anyway, the place was auctioned off and some "investor" from Canada and his Vegas showgirl wife bought the place. Now, after only six months, he's raising the rent - damn capitalist!
Soooooo, on to the good news - ROAD TRIP! Oh yeah, baby! We're hittin' the road tomorrow and driving up to NorCal. We figure that as long as we stop every 100 miles or so and add a quart of oil our '86 Taurus should make it to Sacramento. Okay, get this - FAMILY REUNION! That's right, it's the first time in years that we've all been out of jail at the same time so why not get together, swap some lies, remember stuff that never happened and talk crap about former husbands and wives. Oh yeah, and drink beer and barbecue. Especially drink beer....
We hope they increase our Section 8 vouchers! Our trailer park's new owner and his showgirl wife - Capitalists!
The rent increase caught everyone by surprise! The Pabst keg runing dry also created shock & awe!
So what part of the zoo will your family be meeting in? Will the elephants pack their trunks? Will the zebras change out of their jailhouse stripes? Will the pigeons fly the coup? These answers and many more interesting facts about your gene pool will be found in the next installment of, "Real World: Palm Springs ."
Keep smiling and have fun!
Wendy and Ron
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So you're going to the family reunion! That will be entertaining. By the way, that Las Vegas showgirl, she could certainly have no problem raising my rent! You silly bastards have a beer guzzleing weekend with your family, and remember you kooks, we cannot help but love both of you trailer trash entertainers.
guy and cary.
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